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Old 11-30-2006, 06:25 PM   #1
Meno
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Default Crime and Punishment: The Flutist's Dishonor

The thread

White Shirou: Murasaki Mateki
Meno: Toushi the Eyes

Word Count: Very, very big. Somewhere around 6,522 give or take 1 word.

Description: Remember, remember the fifth of November! Gunpowder and.....


Okay, fine it's something else. Two Sound Nomads live out a special fetish because one was stupid enough to get caught doing something very naughty. VERY NAUGHTY. So naughty that she was sent to the man with six arms. Who likes naughty things. Kinda. Yeah.
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Old 12-01-2006, 02:46 PM   #2
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Yeah, I'll take this one. Expect a rating within the next few days.

Edit: And here it is

White Shirou

43/20= 2.15: 3 Points
Technical Quality- 15
Length- 13
Roleplaying/Combat- 15

Summary: I’ll say upfront that I admire your ability to convey the character’s emotions in this situation. The setting and events of the thread provided ample opportunity for your thoughts to seem forehead-slappingly cheesy, but you managed to veer away from this trap. Furthermore, you demonstrated an fine ability to utilize your knowledge of the English language in a manner that made me happy I was fluent in it, though it didn’t completely knock me out of my chair. Overall, this a good showing, and something that made me enjoy my job,

Meno

42/15= 2.8: 3 Points
Technical Quality- 14
Length- 13
Roleplaying/Combat- 15

Summery: I had a fun time reading Toushi, if not for the simple reason you do a good job conveying his personality. One could get a very good idea of just how much of sickening fun the former spider man was having with every word of your posts, and I commend you for it. However, some typos existed throughout, which serves as my only major complaint for your performance. Despite this, you displayed a technical prowess that is worthy of respect, and helped shape this thread into something I thoroughly enjoyed reading.

Last edited by Kudrov; 12-04-2006 at 02:37 AM..
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Old 12-04-2006, 02:56 AM   #3
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Thankies, Kud. ^ ^ I'll take +2 Willpower and the following jutsu from Stage Three Global Genjutsu, please:
Quote:
Genjutsu Kai (Release)
Requirements: Willpower 8, Intelligence 6, Tactics 8
Special: This skill is not available at character creation for Genin unless they are of the Genjutsu Specialist archetype.
Description: A jutsu that destroys/cancels out an illusionary jutsu attempted on the user once it is recognized as an illusion.
Also, I had 7 weapon points left. Can I use all of them now to buy foot spikes (3) and lingering poison (4) ?
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Old 12-04-2006, 02:24 PM   #4
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I'd like to take this jutsu in Stage 6 of Toushi's Global Ninjutsu list.

Quote:
Kage Bunshin No Jutsu (Shadow Clone Technique)
Type: Ninjutsu
Requirements: Power 21, Control 20, Reserves 19, Intelligence 17, Tactics 15, Admin Approval
Description: A forbidden jutsu that creates clones - which are not just plain illusions (like the normal Bunshin no Jutsu). Each clone is an exact replica of the user, capable of attacking. A direct hit causes the clone to disappear. Chakra is divided evenly between every clone and the original, so creating three clones would leave the user with one-fourth of his remaining chakra. These kage bunshin are also capable of using any jutsu the original shinobi knows (except Kuchiyose and bunshin jutsu), and each kage bunshin may use one jutsu.
I'll be PMing Kaito about the admin approval part. Also, since Kage Bunshin requires 17 Intelligence and Toushi only has 16, +1 will go Intelligence and +1 will go to Willpower. Thanks, Kud.

EDIT: Woot. Kaito gave the thumbs up.
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Last edited by Meno; 12-04-2006 at 03:26 PM..
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Old 12-05-2006, 02:19 AM   #5
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Alright, the proper edits have been made, and thus this is closed and laid to rest.
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